Graduations — whether from preschool or graduate school — represent milestones in our lives. Regardless of the age involved or the years taken to achieve the milestone, academic, social, and emotional lessons were learned. Graduation is an opportunity to reflect on all that happened along the way.
As Maslow would put it, graduation is a moment of self-actualization, an example of reaching. It is a moment of fulfilling a goal. It is a moment of achieving what one set out to do. Graduation parties are meant to be the celebration of the milestone achieved and an opportunity to reflect upon one’s moment of self-actualization.
When the guests arrive to graduation parties, they bring gifts — and questions. Unfortunately, the questions are often about the future: Where will you be going to school? What will you major in? What will you do with a degree in that!? Do you have a job yet?
These “what’s next” questions cause the graduate to shift from reflecting on his/her accomplishments to addressing the uncertainty of the future. Rather than feeling celebrated, they feel interrogated.
While questions about the future are important and serve a purpose, they can only be answered after a period of reflection. The graduate needs time to process their experiences. Processing the past and considering how their experiences led to who they are at this moment in time, opens the door to asking themselves who they want to become.
So, let’s consider some celebration questions to bring to the next graduation party:
● What was one of the best experiences you had in school? Imagine what door that opens for the graduate. What will he/she/they decide to share? An athletic accomplishment? A project completed? A social, emotional, academic experience, or some combination of all three?
● Who had the greatest impact on you while you were there? Was it a teacher? A friend? A family member? This question opens up a conversation about what traits they value and who they want to be like.
● What are you most proud of? This question clearly allows them to reflect on their own accomplishments — in any area.
Open-ended reflection questions like these allow the past/present/and future to merge. We cannot think about past “best experiences” without wondering what kind of experiences we are hoping to have next. We cannot think about people who had an impact on us without thinking about how we want to impact others. We cannot think about what makes us proud without thinking about what that means about what we want to do next.
In other words, these questions allow graduates to reflect upon their experiences and, in doing so, confidently face their future.